Punishment... why and for how long?

What if you made a mistake and someone rubbed your nose in it every day..... for the rest of your life?

So many people who are trying to get their life back on track are tripped up by the very system they are told is there to help them. I know so many on parole and probation who say their parole officer changes the rules regularly, put obstacles in their way to trip them up. They tell me, they believe it is to make them fail so it looks like the officer is doing their job.

Does the system treat everyone one the same, unfairly.... because there are so many who abuse the system, lie, cheat and steal at every turn, tainting the officers and making them cold and callus. Are the officers so overloaded they have to treat everyone as a number not a person with potential?

So what happens to those who are really trying, to do the right thing, turn their mistakes into positives. Some just give up, and say " what's the use" and they go back to their old ways and just waits for the enviable. Back to prison.

Does the system reward the wrong behavior from the officers. Does it reward them for how many possible crimes they may have prevented... I don't know how they are rewarded, but I know the system is broken. Maybe it should reward them for how many people they get back on track and not back in jail... Why do 76% end up back in jail?

Prisons and Parole/Probation unions employ a lot of people and have a lot of money to lobby our elected officials.

Are we just Feeding the beast...

Life of a Felon...

Have you ever thought about what happens to someone who has been arrested and charged with a felony?  What if that felony was because of multiple arrest for drug use or stealing to support their drug use?

Here is the problem, there are limited options for treatment and so without proper treatment, they relapse 80% of the time and end up becoming a habitual drug users and then habitual offenders.  What usually happens is they are arrested multiple times, and finally charged with a felony and sent to prison and may even go through some form of treatment while in prison.  Once they are released from prison they have a parole officer, a curfew and fines and fees to pay.  That’s where the problem really begins.  There are not many employers who will hire a felon, if you apply for a job and are truthful and put on the application you have a felony, that application goes to the bottom of the pile.  In addition, how many landlords will rent to a felon?  So they end up sleeping on couches wherever they can until they wear out their welcome and they end up on the streets selling drugs again trying to support themselves.  On top of all this they have had to learn to be a thug just to survive in prison.  What do you think happens to a nice guy in prison…?  Yes, that’s right.

Now that I have painted part of the picture here is what happens to many.  According to government statistics 76% of those on parole end up back in jail within five years.  While in jail they get accustomed to prison life and many find that because they have a felony prison life is easier than life on the outside. 

They used to say prison is to reform criminal behavior but in most cases it makes things worse.  Children lose their parent, parents lose their children, wives lose their husbands.  There are too many single moms struggling to get by.  No one wins.

Think about it, to protect us from these so called "bad guys" we have made the problem worse.  They come out worse than they went in, they can’t get a job, their family doesn’t trust them and they have nowhere to live.  How do you think they now see themselves now?  They have taken ownership of every label that society has given them and wear it like armor.  You can’t hurt them anymore than they have been hurt already, yeah I know, most of it was caused by what they did, but now they have nothing to lose. 

We need more treatment, not more prison guards.   Treatment needs to include a complete education; job skills, how keep a job, coping skills, character building and conflict resolution. We need to teach them how to survive in the real world and in the workplace. If you just toss them back into situations where they will use the same skills they have always used, which they are quite skilled at and they will fail. 

We need to help them take off that mask they have put on to protect themselves.  Remember when they were children… They didn’t have to wear a mask.

A burst appendix and addiction

A burst appendix and addiction are similar, the both cause pain we can not see.

When we treat a disease we must remember there is a human being behind the disease.  Too often we forget there is a person with feelings behind the behavior, the illness, the struggles and the pain.  We go through life reacting because of our life experience, our callousness and our pain.   

When a doctor is treating a patient with cancer it is easy to remove their self from the human in front of them and see it is just another problem to solve, just another form to fill out.  When we treat an addict we must remember there is a human being behind all the anger, deceit and bad choices.  We must remember they didn’t start out this way, they became this way over time.  The tough part is not to become cold and callous to their condition.  Sure they are going to lie, yell, and treat you poorly. They will even cheat on their UA test, we must look at why they are acting this way.  Is it out of shame, guilt, the pain or is it how they have learned to protect themselves.  When you confront them about lying, cheating and their bad behavior it’s their nature react, to want to protect themselves with more lies to cover up the last lie.  We must look beyond this and still treat them as a person who is hurting. 

What if you were rushed into the emergency room screaming in pain because your appendix just burst and the surgeon said“until you clam down and stop screaming I am not going to treat you”.  The patient would die before that happened.

Realize an addict is in pain; pain you can't see or understand.  Don’t take it personally and don’t let it make you cold and callous.  Look beyond the lies, the anger and the behavior and treat them as a human being in pain. 

Discover what is causing their pain, causing them to act this way, what are they afraid of if they tell the truth and ask for help.  They may not know and we must help them answer the question.

When the surgeon asks the patient where does it hurt, they may get “everywhere” or even “I already told you &(#)#^&..”  This doesn’t deter the nurses and doctors from their mission of saving a life.

You must not be deterred from your mission, because how you treat an addict may save their life and someone else’s life.  

Humanitarian crisis unfolding

Humanitarian crisis unfolding crisis right here at home.

We need to focus on our citizens...

Our prisons are full but not because of crime… Did you know that there are over 705,600 mentally ill being housed in our prisons and are not being treated but instead many are kept in isolation.

Did you know that on any given night there are 57,849 veterans are homeless?  I’m sure you know that there are literally thousands of veterans are still waiting for treatment and many have died waiting for that treatment from our Veterans Administration.

There are 22 million drug addicts and 13 million alcoholics in the United States 27% of the population in the United States will suffer from some form of substance abuse in their lifetime.

What about those who still can’t find a job to feed their family

As of July 2015 the Bureau of Labor statistics state that there are 8.3 million workers currently unemployed, this does not take into account the 90 million who have left the workforce. Currently there are 110 million people on welfare and we spend a $1 trillion to support these programs.

So when you hear people talking about the crisis at the border, stop and think what is happening within our borders, with the citizens of the United States. Think about how they are constantly being neglected and mistreated by our own government.

If you can’t feed your family you are not worried about healthcare.  Our government has spent over a $1 billion on a health care system that still hasn't lived up to the promise of increased access and reduced cost.  How about spending that on building the economy?

Don’t you think it’s time that we sweep our own doorstep and take care of our own citizens instead of trying to solve the problems of every person who comes knocking on our door?  We have a  humanitarian crisis unfolding crisis right here at home.

 http://nicic.gov/mentalillness

http://rt.com/usa/mental-illness-jail-hospital-281/

http://www.familyhomelessness.org/children.php?p=ts

http://www.statisticbrain.com/high-school-dropout-statistics/

http://www.statisticbrain.com/welfare-statistics/

Addiction!! Is like a Snow Cone..

Do you struggle with addiction?  Maybe not... Or maybe you do and don't event realize it.  Do you smoke? Do you eat sweets, drink soda or coffee?  Have you tried to stop any of these?

Many people think of an addict as someone abusing drugs or alcohol and wonders why they just don't stop.  Have you seen the commercials on smoking, showing a person dying from lung cancer and still smoking?  Why would anyone keep doing something that may cost them everything?  They may lose their job, their family, their freedom or even their life.

The answer is not that simple, but it involves your brain.  In simple terms, your  brain was taught by you, what to like or not to like and when this changes your brain is not happy.  Everything you do affects your brain; exercise, watching TV, drinking coffee or even social media. Yes their is an addiction called Internet addiction disorder (IAD).  Have you ever tried to start or stop a habit?  Its not easy.

Lets magnify this a little, if you use drugs or alcohol it changes your brain chemistry an when you try to stop your brain doesn't like it at all.  It will doing anything to get those chemicals back you have been pouring into it every day for years.

Think of addiction this way, have you ever had a snow cone, at first it taste really good and is a bright blue or red, but then all that flavor and color drains to the bottom and now their is no color and no flavor.  This is your brain on drugs.. once the ice has not flavor and no color the brain wants it back.. The brain says.. "Pour more of that syrup on me please".  

 Your brain will try to override everything you do to get you back to doing what it wants.  Until... You retrain you brain.  So next time you can't just walk by a cookie think about who is asking for that cookie? you or your brain.

Do you have a daughter

Do you have a daughter?  Then you should be very worried. 

Are you wondering what is happening with our young men and why they behave the way they do. Most of us don't realize the brain continues to be wired until our early 20's.  Everything our teens see, do and experience is wiring their brain.  The violent movies, violent video games, online conversations and online pornography are changing the way they think, feel and act.  Most of it done in isolation.  This is where they learn how to treat your daughter.  

All of this is wiring their brain and teaching them how to act and respond to the people and world around them.  

No wonder we have an increase in drug abuse and violence.  

Remember when young guys went out to play ball on the corner lot and they had to learn to cope with not being picked or not being the best?  They had to learn how to deal with conflict, being called names, face-to-face, and it usually ended up with them working it out and leaving as friends.  Now it’s all online, name calling, others piling on, one of them ends up hurting emotionally, pulling inward even more.  Now they hurt deep inside and they turn to drugs, porn or violence to numb the pain…

“On any given day, teens in the United States spend about nine hours using media for their enjoyment, according to the report by Common Sense Media. Some 13-year-olds check social media 100 times a day.”

When you combine this with early drug use, yes this includes marijuana, the effects on the brain increase dramatically.  Drug use changes how the brain processes information and how it is wired. Even moderate drug use slows the maturity growth and can cause mental illness. 

As you can see the problems for our young men are spiraling out of control and we need to do something.

I will leave you with one scary fact… “Some national studies show that up to 70% of women have experienced physical and/or sexual violence from an intimate partner”